Showing posts with label I like you but our relationship will not work out. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I like you but our relationship will not work out. Show all posts

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Sunday depression.

Every day is not a sunday, and every day cannot be a holiday. We work 6 days in a week and the sunday is the time we sit back home and enjoy with family and friends. What if, you do not have a family and friends with you. Some times we just feel as if we are alone and no body is around us.

Although, there are the presence of the people near you, far away from you and you can communicate with them despite that also you are far away from them and you think you are alone. You are just simply alone. You cannot see the presence but you are alone and you are rally feeling the pain of being alone.

Why do you feel the pain ? What is the reason behind the pain ? you know it but you do not want to explain it to others. You know beside you no body will cure your pain. No body. The pain is not physical but the pain is mental, the pain is caused by not any disease but the pain is caused by the pain of living a life. It is not good to live a life with just a pain or simply the pain. Some times the pain will try to make you feel that you should leave a life and live without any pain.

Why do we need a food every time to eat ? Cannot we survive without it ? The main cause of many weakness in the present world is food and living for it. We need food and we go for work for getting it. After work we come and we eat but can we really survive without eating it ?

I am really depressed not with anyone or anything but with myself. The word "my" is so selfish. It always reminds me of only me. I just want to get something in life which is meaningless and useless. I do not want to do everything for myself but even i have a thinking of doing it for others how can i do it for them ? What can I do it for them ? I always ask the question to myself that am I giving enough to them or am i really hiding something from them.

Some times I go into the state of silence and some times I am really very excited to take the whole world in my arms and feel as if I can really touch everything present in this earth. As there are always two sides of coin, may be the life gives us depression and joy one after another. Some times the alcohol does the work and some times the words which are very meaningful in life does it.

The unfulfilled desire can lead us to depression, the distance between two people can some times lead to depression too, a simple error done in work can lead us to depression. The causes are numerous but the cure is very less, or in-fact none.

A simple cure would be to take a medicine or drugs but the medicine is not the cure. One has to visit the root cause of it, once you visit the root of the cause then a person will be able to take a deep look at the thougts and then one can really take care of the depression. A cycle continues till the death. This cycle is driven by time and moments. The cycle of unpredictable moments in every one's life.

The point of view may vary depending upon the personal experience and personal taste of life and beauty of it. I often tell to people everything is tasteful only thing is the mind which some times make us think that it is not.

A person who cannot leave in silence is not a person. He has all the time problem with himself and he will face the consequences about it all the times. I have to deal with all those moments and all those precious ones which have taught me a wonderful lessons in life. A lessons which none of the book can teach. It is said that, people should learn from others mistake and others people, through observation of one kind. I am in the process of learning and really hungry for it.

I do not have answers to all the problems in life but I can certainly tell you or give a try based on my personal experiences about the problem and the lessons that I have learnt from them. I do not want to hide any of the things that are with me. Life should be like an open book, where every one can read them and take a wonderful lessons from them. What is use when we make our life a closed book ?

After all, we are giving nothing in return to the world where we are living. Once we are living here one should think of what we can return to it. Have you ever felt the dance of the trees or the leaves of the trees, have you ever seen the rain drops and felt it coming in your eyes, have you ever seen a sparrow bird which was shot by some stupid person and saved by a small kid of 9 years old, have you every seen a rainbow with the different colors and shining on top of your house, have you ever tasted a taste of food that you dream of, if you have not done any of these please go and visit it and do it.

Once you fall in love, there is no rising. You only fall, fall and fall. It is just like going deep, deeper and till the very core of it. It is a total mystery once you fall in love. It is totally negative, it will not teach you how to rise but it will teach you to rise in falling in love. It will take you to very core and will not ask you anything in return. It will put in problems that you have never seen or felt or will feel ever in life.

All problems can be solved easily in life but the problems with love is one of the toughest thing to solve. It is ultimate problem. A problem which takes entire life to understand the core and get to some solutions to it.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Women Vagina

A good news for those women now who wants to go back to the virginity again. Reading the article posted in New York times, I laughed many more times than the words in the article.( It describes about the Muslim women can go back to the virginity again by simple operation in the private clinic and many more cool launches has been done for the sake of it. It is now affordable in a cheap price.

Some times it makes me laugh and some times the same topic makes me feel as it this is not good. Once you loose your virginity what is the use of doing all drama and going back to do the operations for the sake of nothing. It means that you want to live a life with your new partner with a sense of insecurity. What if one day the person finds out the truth and knows that you already had loosen your virginity by sleeping with some body else.

It is very difficult topic how we see the sex and women in many different places of the world. In europe, it does not matter a girl can sleep with those she wants to and the next day she can go and sleep with some body else. Despite the fact that a women has a son or daughter it is not the problem of another men accepting her as a wife. In contrary, in Muslim or most of the Asian world this fact is not accepted as it is seen here in Europe.

Most of the men from those part of the world will not tolerate is a women sleeps with other men or have loosen virginity just like that. It is important to keep the virginity in tact for many women. Some times I feel myself being a women and I try to feel the pain. Men will always feel relaxing or they get total joy in the pain but how about the women. Do they really feel the joy in the pain. May be to some extent but what if the extent is not extended ? What if the pain in not bounded to certain limit ?

Why do a women have to remain her virginity ? May be the question will not try to find the clear solutions but the answer to the question will also not give the proper valuable solution only because Men like to feel the pleasure through pain. I have seen very few who does not see pleasure through pain but many men does.

In europe, a women is respected in all aspects. She has the rights to decide with whom to stay and with whom to divorce. A men just follows what she think is right. A women has equally power on decision making whereas in Asia or Muslim world Men are the leaders and power is not equally divided among women. Most of the women are working in home as a house wifes or doing some minor jobs but most of the time the breadwinner is Men and he is the decision making body.

Well, Virgin or no virgin does not matter as long as a true love between both the species exits. It does not matter a vagina used by one penis or more than one as long as you know those are physical part of the body which exits in every human beings living in this planet. The most important things then comes to are we going to accept it in our lives ? Possibly not or is almost impossible to many of us.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Child Within

A lazy Sunday morning, reminds you that you can sleep longer than the usual weekends. It is good that you get a good sleep but it is not good that you waste your time just like that. A early to rise and early to bed-makes child healthy, wealthy and safe.

We are all child, inside us still remains our childhood, we may become adult, young, old but at the very core of our heart their lies a child who is naughty, who wants to steal something, who wants to smile, and who is eager to know-asks too many of the questions all the time.

A child is pure form of human being. A form which do not have anything to hide, it has direct connection with God, the creator. It talks directly with him. His message are the heard earliest then any other messages. In real world practical scenarios too, a message of child is easily heard by the father. A father immediately replies him with the answer.

A child is sleeping in all of us. Wake him up, make your life beautiful with the child within you. How ? Just wake him up whenever you feel. If he is not sleeping than you look too childish and it is the pure form of human existence. It is clear, pure and beautiful. Every body like child. If not many of them like child.

A child is wise, wants to learn all the time-he is hungry for the learning. He does not know many of the things and many of the stuffs that are present in this real world. He wants to know them. Give him the answer. At least try to convince him. Make him happy. In the process of making him happy you will make yourself happy.

Some times it is very easy to misunderstand the other people if you do not have a kind of childish behavior. A movement of eyes will tell everything about what the other person is saying or thinking. It is most easy way to detect the behavior of the person.

People can talk big, they can have great ideas in their mind but at the very end of the day they still maintain their identity. They are not easily giving off their race, they do not want to listen something wrong about the country, culture, language, ethnicity, developments and so on. People always want to promote by saying my country is good, my land is great and we have this-we have that.

It does not matter what you have or what you have been doing. The most important things that matter is how many people did you helped today ? How many people you make smile today ? How many of them get inspired by your words or your words of inspiration today ? How many think you really are speaking truth and how many of them trust you today ?

In every question their is today. The today signifies that we have to be in present. The moment of time is just Now. People do not have long memory to take it for longer period of time. We tend to forget everything in past or future. It is now which is most important.

A child always lives in NOW. He does not know what is wrong or what is right. He is simple and lives very ordinary life. He has nothing to hide and nothing to tell. If he has something to tell he will easily tell you and he has hide something he will again let you know later. He is not afraid of anybody. He is smiling all the time. A child smiles 5000 times a day but a Man smiles not more than 50 times a day.

The difference is that people when grow become more cautious about the health, about the other people and they think what others will think about them. When you think what others will think you will not do what you really intend to do.

Feel free like a bird, a bird which can fly anywhere it wishes to go. A bird who has an open sky with no difference with any other birds. It might belong to one species of bird but they do not have the real difference. It flies just it has to. It has broader horizon-it can travel all around the world. It has a huge blue sky over it. It has no limitation. It is not bounded by anything. Let us be something similar to a child and fly as if we are bird with not just the literature in our mind but the implement what you have read. Implement in your real life. I know it will be magical. You may even can predict the future-you will always be ahead of times.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Without you.

Once their was a beautiful girl, living in Nepal her beauty was similar to the beauty of Nature and Nepali scent of flowers. She was perfect girl with all the blossom and smiling face every now and then. The guy who liked her was in foreign land. The problem was that the girl had never seen this guy before.

The guy always had seen her, the place she lives, the timing of her office or school and the wherever she goes in the country. The guy was very cute and was very nice too. The girl had no idea who the guy was and she never noticed anything about this guy. Girl was living in her own life.

She has a pleasant life of her own. The guy loves the girl so much that he could not express his feelings for her. The guy is shy, has a deep impact of the girl and always thinks for her. He is in love-the state of negativity the state where he is blind. Everything is fair in love and war.

The fairness of love he could not understand. He wants to express but somehow he could not express it at the right moment. It was dark and snowy day the day when he has to leave her dream girl without even getting glimpse of her. He was not feeling well. He did not want to go away from her but the situation demanded him to go, the situation asked him to visit the foreign land. He never felt a kind of love for her before.

Especially when he was in the moment of being separated. Especially when he was leaving her far behind. He is worried now. He think will it be same ? Can I see the girl in the same way I had seen her. Will she be like a morning first rays of sun that falls in sunflower and looks as if it is soon going to glow. Will it be like that ? What if she is gone and she is not anymore ? What would I do with my one way of liking her.

I could not express my love for her only because she is so far. The greatest obstacle now in my life is the journey that I am traveling. The time is the most valuable thing, it changes everything-especially people. Nature will always remain same. Oh my love, I would do anything for you. Just to see you or get to see your face.

Oh my love I would do anything do listen to your voice. Oh my love why did not or why could not I speak what I am feeling for you. I know you do not know me but what is that keeping me that feeling for you.

I am really shy, I am really feeling deep love for you. The love which no one can understand the love which will remain for me ever and ever inside me. I am not worried about you being with others but I am worried about will I be able to see the same smile on your face.

Today people are changing, will you be same my love. I do not know how people define love-every body says it is two ways it can only happen in two ways- I do not belive in two ways or one ways. I belive in simplicity of my feelings of my heart which always remembers you, your smile your tone.

I always am worried about you. I am alone without you. Only I had your number to call you , I could have done it long before. Now I realize that I should have talked with you. Now I realize that I should have shown you the feelings that I was going through.

Now I really felt that I can even die for you. When some body can give a life for the person whom I have never seen-you know that is special feelings. I am not the creator of my life but I can certainly be able to destroy for you. Why am I feeling such a stupid feelings just for you.

I hope you will be the same and our story will end up being a happy ending. I am also afraid at the same time it won't happen like that. I know that we live in real world where reality is always different then our imagination and what we think most of the times. I hope and pray even you will not be able to see me or even you will not be mine- be happy and smile as i saw you like never before., be happy and cheerful as I saw and wish you never did before.

May we meet in heaven and by the grace of GOD I would have power to express my real love for you. The way I felt for you and reality hidden in my heart which is not coming very easily outside as a expression. Oh my love- I love you as if people will never imagine the quantity, my love for you is full of sky, full of stars you see in the sky and full of flowers present in this planet. I am waiting to see you again, I am waiting if I would be alive by then the first thing I would do is visit you and say that how much I felt deep inside me for you.

Oh my god, please give me power to stand this moment, please bless me with the power of being alone and lonely Now. Without you, it seems life would end. Without you life it seems that I have reached a dead end. I hope my dead end will soon explore the new way.

Hope is all I have dear as I am patiently waiting to see you.

(The article is especially for one brother, who lives in Dubai and the girl lives in Nepal.)

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Am we really in love ?

This spring season, weather is fantastic, shiny, bright, with rays of light crossing your body part giving you some smile to cheer. Love is in the air this spring. Some times I think I am being addicted to it.

You can see from the last three four of the post I am writing all about love, I do not know. I am being addicted to love. I am confused, I am in puzzled, surprised and want to know what is love. In the process of knowing love, you have to first be in love.

Being in love, is similar to being alone. When you are alone you love your self, you love what you do and what you do not do. Being in love is some what similar to that. I do not what is love therefore I will tell you what it feels to be addicted in love.

When a person is addicted in love, the person constantly thinks about the person whom he thinks he should be with, the constantly thinks about that very special person in his life, he remembers all those memories he has shared with her, his memoir, his thoughts are in constant motion towards the love of her lady.

Addiction is some what similar to being addicted in sex, without sex nobody in the relationship can survive but can you ask a person to be in love especially in long distance relationship not to do sex and be in love with the person of his/her dreams ?

It depends upon the person, it also depends upon the commitment and it depends on the truthfulness, trusworthyness of your partner. How can a person be said or judged that he is talented, skillful and intelligent. Person who are educated cannot be categorised as perfect or intelligent.

The categories we give and our concept does not help in case of love, Which is very difficult itself to understand. How do you know that you are in love ? Is sex love ? Where every body knows that lust and love cannot be mixed together. Sex can never be love and love can never be sex. Is sex necessary than for love ?

Can a person be in love without sex and can a person be also in love with sex ? I think yes. A person can be in love without sex and also a person can be in love with sex. It depeneds upon the relationship you are building. It is process, it requires your commitment, it requires sweat and it should be based on truth.

When you say that you are in love how do you feel that you really are in love ? Do you really fall for your partner ? Do you think you can do whatsoever for her/him ? Do you really want to dedicate your entire life for your partner ?

If your answer is yes, then you are not in love. If your answer is no, then surely you might have some chance of being in love and if you say you do not know then their is more chances of being in love.

Do not get surprise by such interpretation. It might seem absurd but it is not. When you say a person that you are in love with him/her. You are finished. At that very point, your love is an end. You do not have anything to give. You have pour all the water in the sea to ocean and the sea is empty.

When the sea is empty their is nothing, it has lost its value, it has become a plane land. Every body will ignore the value of the sea which has turned into land. When you retain as the sea and do not tell your partner that you love however show her in some way that you are in the process. As that time, you are letting your partner guess.

When a girl is in constant guess, when a girl do not get what she really wants she will spend her whole entire life to get it. She will be more committed.

Please note the couple of lines above those are very important.I do not know from where all these thoughts comes or pops up in my mind but these are coming regularly recently in my mind. I hope this is the theory I believe in love. I do not suggest you to do the same but do think after it.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Nature, Desire and Destination

The nature of wind is to blow, the nature of water is to cool, the nature of sun is to glow, the nature of sky is to show and the nature of nature itself is Natural. Every entitty living in the earth has some kind of nature. Some sorts of natural phenomenon which makes then different.

Women fall into the darkness of trap of desire and destination. Can someone please suggest me what is the nature of Women ? Ask a women, Even she does not know. Ask the professor who is teaching women behaviour, even he will not give the exact or correct answer. The nature of women is desire and destination which fals into unknown mysterious land and some women goes to pick desire mostly but some they pick destination.

I was reading an article by PETE MacDONALD "Mom its me, your son, finally" Which describes a true virtue of being a women and being "alone". I don't know if it will be right or wrong to say that women are those sorts of animal who needs either constant support of Man or Man's trust.

I believe every women in this planet needs both-support( legally, financially, socially, emotionally, family+lly etc ). I am not saying this is the fact and I know no one will believe me if I say so, only because I am alive. People give credits to other people only when they are dead. When they are alive no one will or try to give the credits.

I, the very self or I is something which always demands of you all the time. It asks you that you have to do this, you have to do that and so on.Talking about desires and destination we never know what is our destiantion or what might be our destination only because we are living in destiny. How can we predict the things ? Can some one tell me that I know what is going to do next but the output will be exactly the same as I wish, not barely output but "goin to do" will be "done".

How can people be sure that they can handle their life, they are the best and they are the creator of their sufferings. We cannot. We cannot determine what is going to happen or who is going to do what. We are just like a random particle constantly in motion, meeting together, sharing values, emotion, interest and falling apart. We are vast sea of ocean deep unfulfilled with emptiness.

Some times it makes me feel that we are always a player or the script which is given to us. We do what people called GOD tells us to do. We are playing the script written by some one else.

Now, to end the start of un-interesting and boring words let me tell you that we are not what we think we are and we think we are only because we are not what we should be. Don't get confused. It might look confusing but the confusion comes in your mind only because the words enter inside your brain and these words are difficult in your brain to process. Your brain is limited as people think my brain(bheja) is. We invented the computers which can do thousand task and we are creating program which can make computer do thousand stuffs but at the same time we are loosing one aspect which people might not agree with me- We are loosing what we are destined to do most. We are loosing "our brain".

Brain and Mind is two different things which can be discussed later. I hope you got the point of this article the point is- Don't worry be cool, calm and relax ! Enjoy what you like most. Do what you feel good and listen to your inner (GOD). Don't fall into trap of listening too much of only him. Control him rather than he controlling you.

More to come ... I don't know when ...

(Picture taken from:
nature.gif )